Thursday, April 14, 2011

Job Search Update: the Spam edition

Yesterday on LinkedIn I received this message:

Im an agent/blogger/publicist/talent scout if you think that i can help you with your career/company please just let me know...

P.S I can also offer you free advertising in my Blog are you interested in that?

ummm...no.

But that is just PEANUTS compared to the email I received this morning in response to a Craigslist ad for an administrative/personal assistant position I applied for.

Hello,

Thanks for your response and your interest. I will like to properly introduce myself before going into detail of the job.

My name is Henry Clerk 49 years old, Originally from (London) UK,but I have spent 14 years of my life here in United State,presently on a business trip and I need a Personal Assistant urgently to run my errands until I return back to the US. I own an electronics and clothing store in London, United Kingdom. Here below is the job description.

So far, so good. Not sure why I need to know that he's 49, but if you're just skimming the paragraph, it's OK.

1. You will run errands for three times a week and two hours each day.

Umm...ok, which of these would it be? But probably it's 2 hours, three times a week. He just didn't write it clearly. Moving on...

2. You will do my business shopping.
3. You will receive my packages which will be shipped to the nearest UPS office to you.
You will go to the UPS office and pick up the packages. The content of the packages are electronics, clothes, my business and personal letters.
You will open the packages and confirm the contents for record purpose.
4. You will ship out some of the packages where I want them to be shipped to. (You don't have to pay for the shipment. All expenses and taxes will be covered by me)

Damn straight all expenses will be paid by you. But this is starting to sound strange. AND THEN...

5. You will receive payments from my clients on my behalf which will be written payable to your name so you can cash them at your bank. The payments will be in either check or money order. The payments will be for the services you will be rendering and to do my business shopping.

All right, done. We've entered crazy spam land. The only thing left is to see how this deteriorates rapidly for the rest of the email. I've bolded my favorite bit.

Job Requirement:

1. You must have good communication skill.
2. You must be efficient, reliable, responsible and trustworthy.
3. You must be able to perform your tasks effectively
4. You should be able to work 3 times per week and 2 hours each day.

Payment and Work Duration The Job will last for three months. I want to open another electronics and clothing store in the US when I return and if there is need to extend your services, an amendments would be made to your wages and you will be notified accordingly. I will meet you in person when I return back to the US . I am willing to pay $400 per week. Your weekly payment will be deducted from the payments sent to you by my clients.

I need the service of a personal assistant because I am always out of town for business trips. I have been checking my files and what i would want you to do for me this week is to run some errands out to some of the orphanage home,I do that every month .The funds will be in form of Cashier's Check or United Postal Money Order and it will be sent over to you from one of my clients and i have some list to email you once you received the funds,You will make some arrangements by buying some stuff for the kids in the nearest store around you so you can mail them out...I will get you more information on that,I will like you to get back to me with your Contact.

Details such as:

Full Name:
Full Contact Address: (Not P.O Box)
Phone Number:
Age:
Sex:
Email:

Once i received your contact information i will get back to you with the tasks ahead,Understand you will also be paid as well as its important for me to make the necessary steps before i get to the state.

Best Regards,
Clerk

What do you think? Should I take it...to help the orphans?

6 comments:

Buffy said...

Those CL ads get crazy, eh? I'm job-hunting and apartment-searching -- the apartment ones can get just as crazy.

Songs of a Soul Journey said...

I totally feel your pain... I was "advised" to get "LinkedIn" and so far have been linked to so much more email than I can ever pour through in a day, with few actual leads and more like "I have a product or service for YOU!"

Keep hunting! Mercury won't be in retrograde forever... (meant to be silly...)

it's margaret said...

I would report this job offer... sounds like a smuggling scheme.... seriously.

LKT said...

I know! Wasn't that wild? I reported it as "phishing" and flagged it on CraigsList, so we'll see. I also thought posting it here would at least expose it to the light.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Clerk emailed me and said I got the job! ... BOY WAS I FOOLED! I CAN'T BELIEVE I FELL FOR THIS SHEIT! ... He say he is from London UK and he has a client that will send me a money order of $1900.00 and he needs me to cash it in at my bank and keep $250 for myself and send the rest of the remaining to the Philippines. It turns out that the Money Order was coming from, so he say, "Client" is from Fort Myers, Florida. The Money Order was sent overnight to my house and guess what??? He used a Fake name and an address that doesn't even EXIST!!!! and the address on the Envelope that was sent to me doesn't even match the name and address of the Money Order. The address turned out to be an address of a Funeral and Cremation Services in Fort Myers, Florida. I called the Money Order Hotline to see if the Money Order is Valid, and guess what??? ... IT'S NOT!

For all the innocent people looking for a job on Craigslist, please don't be fooled and do your research before you end up getting yourself in trouble with the law. Don't be a VICTIM!

Anonymous said...

If the job offer comes with no valid address, no phone number to reach the person who is offering the job, most likely it's a scheme.